The Art of Gift Giving

 

The Art of Gift Giving

The Holiday Season is a stressful time.  It seems that we rush from here to there with a seemingly endless checklists of parties and social obligations, fun activities and once a year charitable service.  There’s baking and decorating and caroling.  And presents to wrap.  And the shopping. The never ending, soul draining shopping. Forget whatever else they tell you, it was the shopping that drove the Grinch to hide in that cave.  Thanks to the constant artillery shelling of commercials that equate love with the amount and price tag of gifts, people often shop themselves into exhaustion and debt.  Surely, that it what our loved ones want? Right?  A shiny new present to show how much we care.  Isn’t that what gift giving is all about?

The truth is there is a true art to gift giving that has little to do with the amount spent on the gift.  Or not spent for that matter.  To be a truly great gift giver is very simple and there are only a few simple guidelines: listen, think, give of yourself, and love. 

My son’s father was not always the greatest husband, but he did something very special.  He listened to me and tried very hard to remember what I liked and what was important to me.  I still have some of the gifts he gave me.  They’re not expensive, but they were considerate and showed that he had taken the time to listen to me and really think about what I would like.  Even after our divorce, he helped our son learn this same principle.  This also extends to what someone needs.  You don’t know what someone truly needs unless you take the time to listen.  So often, perhaps too often, we may give what we think someone needs or wants without really understanding.

My Christmas tree is full of wonderful examples of thinking about the person you are giving to, as well.  A friend brought me an ornament from one of my favorite places in the world, Rothenburg, and brought precious memories with it.  Every year on Sinter Klaus Tage, we each receive a new ornament.  My children have been buying my ornaments for several years now, ever since they were old enough to figure out that I was buying my own ornaments.  I have numerous Snoopy ornaments, including one on his Sopwith Camel.   My ornament from 2020 is Snoopy all masked up for the pandemic and marks the start of a new career path for me.  But, my favorite ornaments of all, are my three Nativities.  When my daughter moved out, she took her ornaments with her.  One was a beautiful and simple Nativity, which honestly, I missed, something she realized.  It was soon replaced by two small, but elegant ones.  And then, my daughter gave me a beautiful ornament of Santa kneeling at the manger.  It now hangs in the place of honor below the angel topper.

Giving of yourself is always an amazing gift.  Scattered throughout my house are homemade gifts from my Mom.  There are afghans, ornaments, Easter bunnies, and toadstools.  On my walls are framed cards lovingly made an amazing friend, they really are that beautiful. Another friend is attempting to help me keep my first flower garden alive.  It's three simple little iris plants, but the gift of time and supplies may save their poor lives.  Year round I have witnessed those who give freely of themselves, sharing their time, their talents, and truly giving of themselves.  Many of these gifts are small and simple, listening during conversations, checking in on others, dropping off meals or goodies, sometimes just because.  Anytime you see young musicians giving concerts in any venue, local theater groups, volunteers at your library, or that person trying to sneak and shovel driveways without geting caught, they are all giving of themselves.

No matter the gift, the truest gifts always include an element of love.  One way to demonstrate this is to show the opposite.  There was someone in my life who, would occassionaly, give  those small gifts that mean so much.  But after a while, gifts simply weren't given.  No matter how much thought and effort I put into gifts for him, it was made quite clear that how I felt didn't matter. Lack of thought equaled lack of caring or love. Does this necessarily mean that love in gift giving is romantic love?  No, actually all gifts should be given with love, even to those you do not know.  You will be happier and you will do far more good if you give with love.  Think about the Giving Machines that are part of the Light the World Iniative.  It is a chance to directly impact someone you will never see.  Never meet.  Never know.  And people are excited!  They are buying books, jump ropes, water kits, goats, and chickens.  Well, at least the representation of them to be distributed.  A vending machine full of live chickens in Times Square would be a little much even for New York.  All of this money could be spent of fancy gift and famillies are helping others instead.  And they love it.  Families who open their homes to others on holidays.  Everyone who volunteers at anytime of year, there is an element of love there.  The truest gifts always come from love.

How did I learn all this?  From the greatest gift giver of all, the Savior.  In this world as we struggle to celebrate His birth, we can turn to Him to understand.  He listened to those around Him.  Did He turn away anyone who wanted to learn or asked for help?  No, and he doesn't turn us away now.  He is still here and still listening.  He thought about the people He served and knew them personally.  Think of the fish and the loaves.  He knew the people were hungry and He fed them. He gave of Himself more completely and fully than we can possibly understand.  And He did it all out of love for us.  His life, His example, His death, His resurrection, and the Atonement He made for all of us, are the greatest gifts the world has ever been given. They cannot be bought with money or anything fancy advertisements would have you think makes a perfect gift.  The Savior showed us how to be the best gift givers.  Whether you give a store bought present, a homemade gift, an act of service, or a gift of time, you can touch hearts and lives by following His example and the simple guidelines:  listen, think, give of yourself, and above all, love.